


We're Cops and Cursed Again

by Ethereal_Wishes



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Police
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-27
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-12-07 13:41:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11624703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ethereal_Wishes/pseuds/Ethereal_Wishes
Summary: Roman Wheeler and Killian Rogers are partners in the police force, attempting to keep crime to the minimum in the city of Hyperion Heights. What sort of shenanigans could this cursed duo possibly get themselves into?





	We're Cops and Cursed Again

Soft Kitty

A/AN: This idea came to me randomly, and I decided to take it up since no one else volunteered. Rumbelle and Captain Swan are not separated in this fic. It takes place in the new cursed land. Gold and Hook are partners in the force, and I hope to make it quite humorous. The characters will have different last names. Killian Rogers (Hook), Roman Wheeler (Rumple) (Thanks Betsy Paige for the inspiration). Emma and Belle will retain their respective names. This is all meant to be humor and fluff with no ship bashing.

Roman collapsed onto the queen sized bed he shared with his wife, Belle. She was sound asleep, soft snuffles erupting from her throat. It had been a long night on the job. He and Rogers had spent the evening calmly negotiating with a group of bank robbers to release some hostages. The day had ended on a good note, but they weren't always that lucky. Hyperion Heights was riddled with crime and corruption, and he and his partner did whatever they could to keep its citizens safe. 

He briefly closed his eyes, hoping to catch a few hours of shuteye before his next shift began. He bit back a slew of curses as his cellphone rang. He grabbed it, muffling the sound, so not to disturb Belle. He stalked into the kitchen of their tiny apartment, switching on the light. 

He was always on call, because the force had been short-staffed for years. No one had the desire to engage in dangerous police work, especially in a city as unethical as Hyperion. Roman slid his finger across the screen, answering the phone. 

“Rogers, why are you calling me? I just saw you an hour ago,” Roman huffed agitatedly.

“We have a 708, I'm afraid, Wheeler,” Killian retorted irritatedly. 

Roman could sense the disdain in his partner's tone. 

“A cat!? There's a bloody cat in a tree!? You woke me up for that!?” Roman growled, ready to plunge his hand through the phone and choke the life out of Rogers, and then, perhaps, get some sleep. 

“Look, mate, I'm just as thrilled as you are, but someone called it in. Its yowling and keeping the neighbors up. We can't just leave it up there,” Killian remarked unenthusiastically. 

“Fine. Just let me get my coat, and I'll meet you outside in five,” Roman returned, ending the call. He donned on his coat, pulling a cigarette from his pocket. He groaned, lighting it in frustration. 

Rogers pulled up in the patrol car, his eyes leaden with sleep. 

“Would you like me to drive?” Roman offered, noting the exhaustion in his partner's eyes. 

“Nah, the cats just a couple of streets over,” Killian yawned, driving to their designated location. 

Killian parked the car beside the curb, grabbing his flashlight out of the glove box. “How skilled are you at climbing trees?” he asked, glancing at Roman. 

“About as skilled as you are at sailing,” Roman scoffed, climbing out of the vehicle. 

“You're never going to let me live that down, are you? Look, I'm sorry I crashed your boat,” Killian apologized for the thousandth time. 

“Luckily for you, I have a great insurance policy,” Roman replied as he always did when the conversation was brought up. He only did it to antagonize Rogers, mainly because, he was annoyed at being on a dead end road at two In the morning, attempting to coerce a cat out of a tree. 

“I guess I'm going up then,” Killian groaned, shining his light on the unsuspecting feline. The cat clung to the flimsy branch, meowing for help. 

“Hold the light,” he ordered, handing the flashlight to Wheeler. 

Roman fixated the light on the timid animal as Rogers carefully scaled the oak. Killian reached for the cat. It returned his advances with a hiss and a scratch to the arm. 

“Why don't you sing to it, laddie? I bet it'll appreciate that smooth voice of yours! Quite the panty dropper, I hear!” Wheeler taunted the younger cop. 

Killian rolled his eyes at his partner as he recounted the time he'd gotten drunk down at the local bar after a stressful shift and engaged in some Karaoke. His choice of song was, “I Feel like a Woman” by Shania Twain. 

Roman happened to be there and recorded the entire encounter, and several rowdy college girls had really enjoyed it too, even gifting them with their unmentionables. Wheeler liked to tease him about it, and had thankfully never showed the abominable video to Emma. They'd been partners on the force for the last eight years, and Killian knew Roman had his back. He was his most loyal companion, despite some of their disputes, early on. 

Rogers eyed the cat warily, thinking Wheeler's idea might just work. He cleared his throat, serenading the reluctant cat in an annoying song his daughter demanded he sing to her every night before bed. 

“Soft Kitty. Warm Kitty. Little ball of fur. Happy Kitty. Sleepy Kitty. Purr. Purr. Purr.” Rogers sang every note with heartfelt passion. The feline blinked slowly, edging closer to him. He grabbed it by the scruff of its neck before it had a chance to dart away. 

He carefully shimmied down the tree, releasing the stray when he stepped onto the ground. The cat scampered off.

“Bravo, Rogers! If only I had my camera,” Roman replied sarcastically. 

“Haha...Very funny....At least it worked, “ Killian asserted as they made their way back to the patrol car. 

“True, but you wouldn't have even thought of it if I hadn't suggested it first,” Roman countered. 

“Perhaps, but we'd still be trying to coax that cat out of a tree if I hadn't climbed. It's not as if you can do it,” Rogers sneered at his partner. 

“No, but without me, you wouldn't have had anyone to hold the light. Thanks to me, you didn't have to spend the night in a tree,” Roman retorted. Their banter continued as they pulled up beside Roman's apartment complex. 

“I'm glad I don't have to see your sorry arse for the next two days,” Rogers grinned smugly at the older cop. 

“You only got those days off because you've been spending time under the chief's desk again,” Wheeler comeback, gleaming snidely at Rogers as he shut the door. Rogers flipped him a bird as he drove away. Roman chuckled, knowing deep down, he couldn't have asked for a better partner.

A/ANL Prompts are welcome! I made up the police codes, because I don't have time to study and find out their true meanings.


End file.
